The Incredibly busy life of a Matilda Jane Clothing Trunk Keeper

Late last night, on a whim, I decided to click over and check my blog stats.  Someone out there in cyber-space is interested in me.  Who knew, right?

I took this as a sign that I should show my little blog some love and attention.

2012 has been a blur of illness, activity, and insanity.  And it's only been 46 days!

Recently, Jerrod and I were able to spend some time with our best friend's Erik and Jennifer while they took some time off between a job change.  Our kids played together, we laughed, enjoyed margaritas, and had a grown-up evening out.  It was a perfect time that ended to soon.  One day, hopefully, our families will live in the same town.

My children are learning to adjust to the growing demands of my job as a Matilda Jane Trunk Keeper.  When I took the job offer 2 years and 3 months ago, I never imagined what a fulfilling opportunity it would be.  The customer's I have met, are now my friends, and they have enriched my life in so many ways.  I can not imagine doing anything different.  Matilda Jane is such a blessing on my life.

I think it's funny that in 2 of the above images, you can see my Trunk Keeper junk.  It's taken over my house, but in a good way.

This season I was fortunate enough to bring on a Trunk Keeper to service the mountain towns in Colorado.  Her name is Jami, and she is a delight.  We were able to spend a few days together in January at our Team Conference.  She is my little button.  So cute.

This season has already started off in a huge way.  I feel like the trend toward de-sexing our little girl's is in full swing.  Discount retailers have been trying to dress 6 year-old's like 18 year-old's and parent's have had enough.  I know I have.  In my opinion, one of the greatest benefit's of Matilda Jane Clothing is that your little girl gets to continue dressing like a little girl should.  Cute, sweet, age-appropriate & on-trend.

I can't promise I'll be back tomorrow with a new post, but I will try.

Trunk Show tomorrow night in Denver. :)

It's been a long time, huh?

I don't even know where to begin, but I think I will 'take a pass' and move forward.

The 3 kids and I spent NYE in the Emergency Room.  Jax started 'exercise-vomiting' at 8pm so we were checked in to the ER by 9:07pm.  Fortunately, I informed the front desk that our insurance company was changing at midnight, do they graciously waited to admit Jax to the pediatric ward until 12:07am.  Happy New Year.

His nurses, were amazing.  I was able to get all 3 kids tucked into bed by 1am, which was a huge blessing.  Jerrod got off work at 3am, and took Ace home with him.  Snuggling with B, while alarms were going off like crazy, was comforting.

We are learning to deal with pre-asthma for both boys.  Asthma....I am devastated.  All my life, it was the one thing I wished God would take away.  He didn't.  Instead, he multiplied it on my boys.....my precious boys.   Whatever He is trying to teach me, I am a little too bitter to learn, at the moment.

J has pneumonia.

I know, right.  What else could happen to this poor baby's lungs?  I watched him breathing last night & my eyes drifted down to the scar where his chest tube was.  14 months later, I am still worried about his sweet little lungs.

Last night, the doctor called & told me that the radiologist who read his x-ray was alarmed, so he pulled J's x-ray from April & the images were almost identical.  Something about bi-lateral changes.....a few more fancy words that I couldn't understand.

So, we have started him on medicine & nebulizer treatments.  He looks like a baby Indian smoking on a peace pipe.  Which is fitting because I think he is 1/16 American Indian.  I think.  It's somewhere between 1/16th & 1/32nd.....

Today there was 'no change' with his condition, but I am hopeful for tomorrow.

My friend Holly told me tonight that she felt called to pray for J at 3:50 this afternoon.  God is amazing.  A.Maz.Ing.  Starting at around 2:45, Jax got extremely fussy.  Coughing.  Wheezing.  Hacking.  Crying.  Nothing unusual for his condition, and certainly nothing I am not prepared to handle.  I was driving back up from an errand in Manitou & I couldn't decide if I should swing by the house to pick up his blanket or get him something to drink before picking up B from school.  I opted to be on-time to pick up B from school, and Jax just wimpered the entire time.

We walked in the door at 3:45 & I went straight to the kitchen to make Jax a bottle.  (Yes he is 14 months, but it's in his best interest, because of a lot of reasons)  I put him in his bed & he tried to settle down(3:50!).  I re-filled the humidifier, turned on the fan & a/c & closed his shade.  He kept wimpering, so I came downstairs and prayed for him to rest.  He immediately settled down & slept deeply for a full hour.

When I heard him stirring on the baby monitor, I went to get him. (Mildly annoyed that he had only slept an hour.  And I may have accused his siblings of waking him up.....)  J was up.  Bright-eyed and grinning from ear to ear.  It was a good, restful sleep. :)

I am sitting here thinking about how many times I have felt the urge to pray for someone or something, and in my busyness, I move on to the next task on my agenda.  What amazing things could come from my obedience to pray?  How can God use me to bless a friend's life?  Wow.  What a blessing & privilege it is to pray for others.

So, thank you Holly!  Thank you for the wonderful woman & friend that you are.

And thank you to all of the other's who are praying for J's lungs.  J is going to heal & be well.  His lungs are beautiful, precious, and healthy deep down underneath this sickness.

He has until Friday to make progress before the doctor has to make a decision about which direction to go.

6 years ago.

Six years ago today I was sitting in a hospital room on my 3rd day of a pitocin drip.

My doctor was committed to a natural childbirth, but deep down I knew that ship had sailed a long time ago.

Jerrod and I were alone in my hospital room talking about meeting our daughter for the first time.  We were nervous, anxious, excited, thrilled....etc.....

Jerrod fell asleep first, like he always does, and I was left alone listening to the beeps and alarms on all of the machines in my room.

I thought about my daughter.  Her beautiful face.  Her sweet body.

My mind soon filled with hopes for her life.  I prayed for her.  I prayed for her future friends.  I prayed for her future husband and children.

I drifted off to sleep dreaming of that first moment when I would hear her cry out.

My darling B joined us at 11:49 the next morning.  She was born on a Sunday, and tomorrow, her sixth birthday is on a Sunday.

My precious Sunday girl.

She has brought the Son to my life in every way.

She didn't cry right away.  It was the most terrifying moment I had experienced up to that point in my life.  I remember Jerrod couldn't even stand he was so scared.  I was screaming at my doctor to tell me if she was okay.  Screaming.  Begging.  Pleading.

"Give her a minute."  "She just needs a minute."  "She will cry.  Just wait."

We waited 2 1/2 minutes.  Then she wimpered, and my soul wept.  It was a wave of gratitude to a most gracious God who had just given me the deepest unknown desire of my heart.

B is everything I never knew I wanted.  The minute I found out she was growing inside of me, I was consumed with a passion for her.  I promised to sacrifice anything to make all of her dreams come true.  She is my precious gift.

Being able to be with her every day was such a blessing.  I changed so much after she was born.

She was such a good baby.  Sweet and loving, while still being strong-willed and unpredictable.

By the time B was 1 year old, we had lived in 4 homes in 3 states.  She never had trouble adapting to a new place.  We explored our new cities together.

By the time she turned two, I knew there was something different and special about her.  If you have ever met B, then you know this is true.  She has the most gentile spirit.  She always thinks of others and how they feel.  She is careful to consider how her actions will affect someone else.  She is a great friend.

I call her my gypsy.  She is wild.  Unashamed.  She wants to go and experience new things.  She loves to discover, move, turn, dance, sing, paint, draw, write, create, be.

She wants to be an artist when she grows up.  Jerrod thinks that means that we will be supporting her indefinitely.

I told him there are worse things that could happen.

Whatever the dream....

Whatever her desire.....

I want to give it to her.....

She has made the past 6 years of my life so incredibly special.  The sweet person she is growing up to be is magical.  6 years of magic.  How did I get so lucky?

I love you Bre, with everything in me.

Happy 6th Birthday darling girl.

select photos courtesy of Portraits by Jenn

SOOC - B's Photography Download

210 pictures downloaded

1 awesome shot of A that B took one afternoon.

This image is "so him."

ONe yEaR

What a difference a year can make.  I just finished icing J's birthday cake for his 1st birthday party tomorrow.  

I should be in bed, but decided to turn on the television to see what Hurricane Irene was up to.  I saw the time was 2am.....and I had to catch my breath.  One year ago, at this very moment, I was alone in my hospital room recovering from surgery.  I had helped put J to bed in the NICU around 11pm, then went back to my room to get some sleep.  I remember pumping briefly around 2 am, then drifted back off to sleep.  Just 2 short hours later, a nurse entered my room to let me know that J's lung had collapsed, he had stopped breathing, and they had no choice but to intubate him to save his sweet little life.

The room started spinning.  I had to ask her again what exactly she was talking about.  Surely she was mistaken.  It was 4 in the morning, maybe she walked in to the wrong room.  She proceeded to tell me again, that J had stopped breathing.  Stopped breathing.  Stopped.  Like it was a switch he could turn on and off.  My darling boy, who was not yet 24 hours old,  could have departed as quickly and quietly as he had come.

The nurse asked if she should call anyone, but I started feeling sick.  I told her that I needed some medicine to help me sleep for a few hours before I could start to understand what was happening.  The nurse looked at me, not with pity, but with a gentle understanding.  She sweetly tucked me into bed, and promised to be there when I woke up.  Sweet angel.

These past 12 months with J have been the blessing of my life.  He has brought overwhelming amounts of joy into all of our lives.  His relationship's with B and A continue to grow every day.  J reaches for them both, and they light up like the 4th of July.  They love each other wildly....like a hurricane. (ironic enough)

I know that every mother feels this way, and it may sound a tad cliche, but I can NOT imagine my life without his precious life.

He is life and breath and everything good.

His sweet hands that grip my arm while I hold him on my hip.

His two front teeth that just can't seem to come in all the way.

His wispy strands of hair that can only seem to stick straight up in to the air.

His determination to crawl even though we want nothing more than for him to walk.

He is holding on to his baby-hood for me.  And I treasure it.

I think back to that 4am wake-up call, and I don't have any regrets.  J's time in the hospital changed me.  I learned how to truly be strong.  I learned how to advocate while being gracious & gentle.  I learned a whole new way to love & provide for all of my children.

What an amazing difference a year can make.